Monday, July 28, 2014

Extremeties

The life that i know now is a hectic one.  Everything is based on schedule and in need of proper arrangements for efficient management. Im not sure if this is because i chose it to be or because its the only way to make things work as it should. Im not sure if this is because im becoming of age or its just the way it is now.  Am I stuck in that idea that i was still the same person i am 10 years ago?  Is it time to grow up and be a real and mature grown up?

Somehow there is that part of me that refuses to... 

But what is it really?  What happened to that me who loves spontaneity? What happened to the me who's more after the experience that the results?  Is that maturity?  Old people are not fun in general, Is is for this reason?

For someone who feels old, i have too many questions.  I just wish I can actually talk to someone with answers...




Sunday, May 25, 2014

Unexpected Thorns

I can take bad things at work
I can handle stress from last minute changes
I can go through a bad to worst day
But this feeling that i have now, i never prepped for this.
That feeling that you start counting the good things you've been giving and yet you get not a thank you or a pat in the back but a big slap to your face. And from someone you never get tired of giving to. 

This is the sort of pain i never expected nor prepared for.

Monday, May 5, 2014

That Certain Sadness

I try to be happy.  God knows I do.  I always remind myself of the blessings we have been receiving as a family.  And everyday i am thankful.

But then, there is that part of me that cannot be forgotten.  And that unforgettable part is just too effing sad.  I might have to dig into it with some professional help already.

I cant get it out of my heart.  Its just too heavy.

It usually goes away.  I usually get to control it after a few days of depression.  Im just on my 3rd day after that faithful Saturday argument that triggered the outpouring of too much emotions.

Now, i just need to get myself together, then Again.


Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Writing More

Every year, every January, i always make it a point that I tell myself to find time to write more.

And every February, i look into my site and find that post on promising to write more.

I should have a constant changing list of things to write about.  The other night, right before a major event we have for a store opening, one of the big boss sent me an sms and asked me to email to him his speech for the following day.  I was hesitant to say that i really did not prepare anything as i assumed big bosses do their own speeches, that will definitely sound super bad.  So i just replied by saying, i will send him something in a while and that i am not a very good writer so he's free to edit away!

After almost an hour with a colleague trying to come up with a one-pager, we finally finished.  It was not an award winning one but i was again surprised to find myself come up with a sensible output.

Anyway, Its just one of those days that i felt like starting the day with a few written words.